Book

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Dead End Drive by Ian Kirkpatrick

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Horror, Satire

After his mother passes away, fourteen-year-old Kelly Benedict has no choice but to escape his home or parish at the hands of his remaining family.

When Agatha Benedict plucked Kelly off the city streets to replace her dead cat Poopsie, she neglected to inform him of some very important house traditions. The history of the Benedict Estate prescribes that once the estate owner passes on, a will reading is to take place. However, the reading is more than passing on a loved one's final wishes; it's a figurative gunshot into the air, an alert to all in attendance that a playful game of anything goes murder has begun. The prize? The inheritance, of course. As if visiting, a storm comes in with the guests, trapping everyone on the property for the night. While Kelly plays catch-up on with house rules, once friendly family members have already sharpened their knives. Try as he might, there is no survival if he won't play by the same rules as everyone else.

A uniquely funny and dark murder party with big personalities. A coming-of-age story if growing up felt like being stabbed in the back by everyone you hold dear. As suspenseful as Agatha Christie's And then There Were None and as slapstic as Clue, Dead End Drive is wild night of nihilism for the sake of personal advances at any cost. Let's be honest: is there anything more valuable in life than having every last need met for life?

Dead End Drive Audiobook Sample

Bleed More, Bodymore by Ian Kirkpatrick

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Supernatural Thriller, Urban Fantasy

HORROR IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN EVIL OVERTAKES THE HEART.

 

Joey, a mechanic, receives a phone call late in the night to pick up her friend's car from the infamous Baltimore body dumping grounds, Leakin Park. She arrives to find the car abandoned and her friend missing entirely. When she brings the car back to the body shop, she then finds a body in the trunk. While the Baltimore Police Department tries to find her friend under for suspected murder, Joey races to find him first and discover what really happened, where that body came from, and just why there's so much death in Baltimore.

When Joey discovers a ghost town below Baltimore, she meets a reaper, a raven, and her future. She thinks she's going crazy, but it is only the start of her seeing the world for the first time for what it is and why everyone in this city is always angry — has always been angry — will always be angry. Bash the windows, bash your neighbor in the nose, take whatever shiny thing you see in the store, you deserve it.

Bleed More, Bodymore Sample

Boom, Boom, Boom by Ian Kirkpatrick

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Satire, Literary

COMING May 1, 2022

Hello, Boomers!

Check out the most popular explosives experimentation channel in Ukraine, JananananaXD!

Jan Bagan is a Ukrainian YouTuber living in Nide, a small, rural town leaning against the Russia border. While he stocks the only grocery store in town during the night, his love of all things combustible fuel his YouTube channel where he makes art in the sky chance he gets. He's not classically trained by any means, but with a little lick and a strong nose, he's usually pretty good at mixing things to get a satisfying ending.

Though his talents are mostly overlooked in his small town, a couple of Americans spot his talent. Upon visiting his home, they offer him a sponsorship... and some military-grade explosive materials. However, when one experiment causes Russia to accuse Ukraine of tempting war, there's no choice but to allow the Russian to come in and seek out the terrorist leaving bombs at the border. Yet, the Americans are particularly impressed by the display and offer Jan his lifetime dream: an all-expense paid trip to the United States and his own television show.